Test of Faith

My wife was upset with me yesterday for not doing enough over this long Christmas vacation. I have worked hard at accomplishing any goal that she asked help from me but it wasn't enough. She complained my training takes too much time; it is costing us more than we can afford and so on. I felt let down by my tri-coach. I asked him to write a little bit about himself and why he wants to train triathletes and to send me a race picture. I sent him the blog URL and he hasn't said anything yet. I suppose he has been busy and will get around to it eventually. Maybe he will say something if he reads this? In this moment, I feel like he doesn't really care. I woke up this morning at 4 and prayed while I laid in bed thinking about what and why I am doing this training. Then, I hold the mirror up to myself and start looking. Am I being petty and unfair about this? The answer comes easily: yes. Ryan has delivered the results he promised. My running endurance has increased and my 5k time has really improved. My swimming efficiency has improved. I'm seeing incremental improvements in my cycling form and strength. He arranged to come in on his day off to do a 2 hour bike session with us today. He has gone the extra mile to help our class push harder; to help us grow.

I woke up again at 4:50 and decided to just go. This is a test of faith, I'm obviously not perceiving this correctly. I asked Kelly for permission to go and she said yes. That little voice inside prompted me to go. This inner voice has really cut me slack, I don't hear it criticizing me. I have been careful to always be encouraging to others and this same attitude has turned to help me. I noticed as I ran up the snow and ice covered hill somones running ahead and beside me. When I looked closer I couldn't see them. I suppose God sent me some help to keep me going. I felt comforted and strengthened to keep running, that what I'm doing is right. It was an answer to my prayers to keep going the distance.

I want to participate in the St George Olympic Triathlon on May 15, 2010. It is discounted $20 if I sign up before the 1st, so today is it. I'm struggling because I wonder if I'll be able to buy cycling shoes and a wet suit. I suppose I could rent the equipment for this race and do my best. I suppose this is the leap of faith. It's funny how 5 months seems like such a short time. I'm asking myself if I can really do this and my gut feeling is of course I can!!